Public confession of cbtslave4U

[cbtslave4U]

I kneel here today to publicly confess my cheating and failure as a husband and a slave. It is with deep regret that I have misled and failed the following 3 Superior Women and beg for there forgiveness even though I know that I do not deserve it.

The first Woman I misled was Miss Lisa. I begged Her for permission to join Her game here on Milovan and She allowed me to do so. I followed Her instructions but at the time I was playing Her game I was the property of Mistress Angela and I did not tell Miss Lisa about that. I beg Miss Lisa’s forgiveness. I am not worthy but hope that She can find a way to forgive me.

The second Woman I misled was Mistress Angela. I failed Her in 2 ways. First I began serving in Miss Lisa’s game without Mistress Angela’s permission or knowledge. This was of course wrong because I belonged to Her. The second way I failed Her was that I am married and really did not have the right to become Her slave to begin with. I beg Mistress Angela’s forgiveness and understand that I am not worthy of it. I have been very dishonest and deserve nothing but retribution for my actions.

The third Woman that I misled is my Wife. She is a wonderful Woman and happened to stumble across my email account and that led to Her finding all about my serving Mistress Angela and all of the other websites and forums that I visit on FemDom and BDSM. I know this was a total shock to Her and it hurt Her deeply to find out this stuff about me. I never wanted to hurt Her and knowing that I did is by far the worst punishment I have ever endured. After the initial shock, and some very long talks and explaining about the sites and my needs to be a slave to a Dominant Woman She has decided to take ownership of me and learn more about the lifestyle. I beg Her forgiveness for all that I have done and pray that She will find it in Her heart to forgive me.

I also apologize to any and all members of Milovana for my actions.

cbtslave4U

[Mistress Steph]

I am new to this and must admit that I was shocked when I found this stuff on my husband’s computer. The hurt I felt was tremendous. After talking with him and Mistress Angela about this I have come to the conclusion that I love my husband very much and if he truly needs to be a slave he is going to be MY slave. I am going to learn all I can about this and am now very excited about it. He is already starting to figure out that he may be getting more then he bargained for because this is no longer fantasy but is reality. I ask that Mistress Angela, Miss Lisa and the rest of the people on this group give me any advice they may have on how to learn more about the Mistress/slave lifestyle. Also I am looking for help in punishing him for what he has put me through and how he used this site and the lovely ladies on it to cheat on me.

Thank you all for your help.

Mistress Steph

[somethingwickdthiswaycums]

i wish the both of you much luck and happiness together

[Foxhawke]

Overlooking the cheating and breaking trust bits, I'm happy for both of you that you can explore this exciting area together, in real life, and hopefully it will bring you both closer to each other.

I would love to contribute advice and such, but my experience with this is limited to webteases on sites like this and I'm sure the good Mistresses that visits this forum has far more constructive and useful things to tell you.

Good luck to both of you and I hope it all works out to the best!

[NoCumming4Me]

The first thing you must do is get a chastity device and lock it on him. That way he can't cheat on you anymore. It also allows you to let him cum whenever you choose. It will also help you while training him to be your new slave. You would be amazed at what you will be able to get him to do for you while he is locked up. Servicing you orally, while not allowing him any release, getting massages from him, make him bath you, make him wait on you hand and foot. Make him do the chores, like cleaning, laundry,cooking. Enjoy and have fun with your new slave.

[NoCumming4Me]

Here is a link to a page about how to control your slave. Good Luck
http://www.chastitytube.com/control.html

[Executive Angel]

Congratulations Steph, and Good Luck. Remember never get mad, just get even Hope the journey will always remain to take you to new heights that you didn't know you had! "Happy Holiday!" Angelic Secretary

[Mistress Steph]

Thank you all for your nice responses. I did not expect congratulations but now that I look at it I agree it is a new begging for my husband or is it slave...(still have to get used to it) it is comforting to know that so many others understand our situation. For those that have sent me private messages about thoughts on how to bring it up to their wives all I can say is it really hurt to find it the way I did. Being honest with her has got to be better then being blindsided by a secret life your husband is living. I would suggest starting slow with some hints or talking about it in a general way first. I can not honestly say how I would have reacted if my husband had come to me with this but I would hope I would have reacted positively and I do know that it would not have hurt so much.

Thanks again to all and please keep up with any help, advice or ideas. It is truly wonderful to have so many helping us succeed in this.

Mistress Steph

[dark]

I am new to this and must admit that I was shocked when I found this stuff on my husband’s computer. The hurt I felt was tremendous. After talking with him and Mistress Angela about this I have come to the conclusion that I love my husband very much and if he truly needs to be a slave he is going to be MY slave. I am going to learn all I can about this and am now very excited about it. He is already starting to figure out that he may be getting more then he bargained for because this is no longer fantasy but is reality. I ask that Mistress Angela, Miss Lisa and the rest of the people on this group give me any advice they may have on how to learn more about the Mistress/slave lifestyle. Also I am looking for help in punishing him for what he has put me through and how he used this site and the lovely ladies on it to cheat on me.

Thank you all for your help.

Mistress Steph

Wow that is a fast change. You find out about your man's desires and now you create an account here with the name "Mistress"

I can understand that you was shocked. But keep in mind his wish is to treat you as a queen and satisfy you in every way (I assume this because he says he is submissive). So there is nothing bad for you. A lot of women want a strong man and they don't want a man who is weaker then themselves. But in my eyes to accept your own desires and be able to submit to a woman makes every submissive man strong. To say it simple: You need balls to do that, because you break the old fashioned gender roles in our society.

And please don't make the mistake, read too much about BDSM/Manipulating/Chastity in the internet and follow every advice. If you say you love your husband you don't need any advice except of security advices. Find your own way and always remind your responsibility. And the last most important thing is: Never loose the respect.

Oh and I know this post was a bit ironic because I adviced you

[camel]

My advice....

First and foremost: Don't try to fit inside his head. Look inside his head but remember that it's not ideal, even for him, if you try to be his ideal. You need to be you.

Second verse, same as the first: He married YOU. He feels a huge pull towards this kind of stuff and yet he married you even though you weren't aware of it. Dysfunctional, but it's definitely a compliment in disguise.

Third: I think getting a chastity device now is both a horrible idea and a great idea. I think it will refocus him, which is huge, and you know he won't be jacking off thinking about other things. However, if he's likely to have moments of weakness where he wants out, and if you are the type to feel guilty about that, then a chastity device might be too soon right now.

I guess all three above are variations on the same theme. It's like you're a queen who just was gifted a war horse. That horse WANTS to proudly be an extension of will, wants to exert himself for a higher purpose, wants to work with the rider. From many points of view, it's noble. Paradoxically, your horse is at first VERY likely to get so carried away that you might feel out of control as your horse tugs at the reins saying "RIDE ME OVER THERE, RIDE ME OVER THERE". It's funny in a way, but not if you're the queen fighting to not be taken hostage by a runaway horse!

I think the trick is to remember that (unlike the analogy) you can easily climb off and walk off whenever you like. Once, long ago, I was scening (i.e. in a "scene", domination role play without the overall 24/7 lifestyle) with a submissive woman and I held her chin. She started to struggle, wanting to be 'taken'. I could have pounced and fought her, but instead I kept my hand in the same place, loosened my grip, and was genuinely amused.

She stopped struggling and put her chin gently back in my palm.

Your experience may vary, but I still get a head-rush just thinking about that moment.

[dark]

You can't compare a human with a horse In my post I talked about advices like that, sorry camel no offense, but to compare a submissive person with a horse draws a wrong picture for a newbie.

In fact I think this is the big difference. A submissive female or male wants to submit to his/her partner without forcing. In this case, if the dominant part is not experienced and the first thing she starts with is manipulating his personality she could damage the whole relationship. These are things you can do later if the relationship grows.

And starting a power exchange relationship with a chastity belt? You don't think this is a bit too fast? What about granting both the chance to explore themselves and their partners desires, before starting these extreme things?

I agree with some points in your post in general, but I don't understand why all people in the internet want to encourage other people to do it in their way.

[camel]

Excellent points, Dark.

[dark]

Thank you for your understanding camel, I was a bit afraid that you would be offended

[camel]

Dark,

I actually laughed pretty hard when I saw your post because I literally wrote a point of caution about reading advice on these boards for the same reason, then erased it when I realized that would be yet another point that said the same thing in a different way!!!

I do think you can compare anything with nearly anything and get useful insights. I don't think the analogy is a bad one. Extending it to say 'some humans can be treated like horses' is wrong, though.

I really hesitated about echoing the chastity belt suggestion. I think it might be too soon, yes, but I also considered:

• Dude's name is 'cbtslave4u'. CBT, Slave, 4U. That's a pretty elegant way of packaging a lot of implications.
  He's on this site.
  It's possible that any 'refocusing' device would be a good thing.
  If (and only if) she's comfortable with how she'll feel when he wants out, it will give her confidence that, at least, the "4U" part of his nickname no longer applies.

Anyway, that was what was in my head at the time. However, I think you're right that it's fast. I think the worst case is that she uses it, she hates how it makes her (or him) feel, but is afraid to take it off because she doesn't feel like she can trust him even with the device. That would be really bad, and it's very possible. It has the potential to be a crutch that could make sure things DON'T start in the right direction.

However, when she's ready, I do think it will be a good thing.

[MistressAngela]

I hope you are enjoying your new life style. Listen this guy is a pro he can take anything you want to give him. All you boys out there who read this help this lady out and give her some of those thoughts you have in your perverted heads. She needs ideas to keep it fresh.

Mistress Steph as always any questions just ask I couldn't be happier for you.