Lonely Nights FB

[hhhobo]

Good start, but you really need appropriate pictures to get the real feel of the fantasy. At least half of the pictures didn't even come over- just the dreaded red x. But the line is good, and the demands are exciting. There is promise here.

[KlariCat]

Wow thanks for the fast feedback!
I agree 100% on the pictures sadly as long as I'm limited to my phone I can't seem to get any pictures in there aside from the " Kink.com" sets :(
( lesson learned I guess, makes me want to take my laptop and edit them right away... might make for some "interesting" looks at the airport )

[fah0436]

i agreaa mostly with hhhobo. i hand no trouble with the images, but they are certainly not appropriate for the tease. more appropriate photos are definitely needed.

maybe you can add a substory were some women (other employees???) come back and see what is going on.

[phazfun]

Well written, but yes needs pictures "that was so hot, lets do it again" ;)

[Ford]

Well that was an interesting one! I have to also mention that it's a shame about the pictures (they all displayed for me, but I wasn't looking by the end). But as a story, this really was great.

You very rarely get this quality of writing in a webtease. It was extremely sexy (and made me want to follow along) just because of the believable, carefully-done dialogue. The character is believable and subtle, and teasing. Liked it! I hope you will write or have written more stories / teases, author!