Financial domination addiction...

[findomaddict]

I am not sure if this is even the right place to write this, but i feel like i need to share some of my thoughts right now.

Some time ago i didnt even know there was something like financial domination.
And some day i read about it and i researched different themes related to findom. It didnt take long until i was talked into my first tribute and as a matter of fact it was a small penis tax. It really gave me a rush. So i asked my self why is that?

There was a totally strange woman taking my money and i enjoyed it. Right now i know there are several women out there who would love to take money from losers like me. Still the feelings i had the other day were not only about giving away the money, it was the control i gave away to a totally strange person. And with that comes a hard thrill because of the humiliation that comes with paying a tax like that. What would be more humiliating than paying for something i cant even change like the lenght of my penis or even the permission to ejaculate.

So after some time i would love to quit this fetish, but i find myself psychological and physical addicted. It has become hard for me to climax without paying my tax and even if i manage to cum without a tribute i feel pretty bad about it. This is starting to affect my whole life. I am a young student and thats why i dont have to much money to spend. But i do always find myself getting talked into another tribute, over and over again. No matter how often i tried to stop it, i am always drawn back into it. Maybe you got some advice.

I am writing this here, because i used to masturbate every now and then to some teases from milovana without paying to climax some years ago and maybe this is the place to find some help or at least some opinions on my case.

Thank you for your interest.

[SexualChoc]

I would be happy to help!
All you have to do is follow all my instructions
and send $100 (or Euros)
to:
I'm a Sucker
5555 Nowwhere Ln
Submissive PA 8008

FYI There is no such address

There are litterly 100's of teases on this site for Free, FREE !!!
Now if you want to do it for fun, well what ever you want
but it sounds, or appears that you want help stopping.

I did a challenge where I asked someone to give me tasks
and that I would do them. (as all2true)
You could try the same, but realise 90% chance it would be a GUY giving instructions
You could ask for that

There are several long challenges that dominate you.
Ritz is the most recent writter with more than 2 weeks worth of instructions.
see: http://www.milovana.com/webteases/#author=11234
if that is not enough do 2 teases or even (gasp) 3 a day!
everytime you feel like you can't take it anymore and you abolutely have to cum
place $100 into a pass-book savings account
(one you can not assess with a card and have to into the bank)
And Save up Money for:
a vacation
A big ring for the girl of your dreams
A trip to Denmark for the sex clubs
( or something else special)
Anyway, Luck to you!

[AngelAnna837]

Try this for a month, every time you think you have to pay someone to cum, put the money you would spend in a jar, or a savings account or the like when you get to the end of the month blow the money on something you really really want for yourself this ISN'T financial domination.

You have been conditioned into thinking that this is the only way to achieve satisfaction, but i really think fantasy could work just as well, every time you give to the jar or savings account, you are giving to some on-line Pro-Dom. Do it along to one of the web teases that way you are still getting the tease but keeping the money, I know to start with it wont be exactly the same thing and it will take some time to adjust but stick with it for a month and i promise you will notice a change in your feelings.


On a personal note, i have just Finished university and thankful i have a well paid job, but even then i didn't have a huge amount of money to play with. I don't know how far thought your education you are but i have had friend that have waster money on a huge number of things and then were forced out of education because the didn't have the money to support them self. so take a step back and think, "is this was i really want to spend my money on". Uni or collage is tough, and something like this could really make or break it for you.

So right now you need to decide what's important, i know its harsh but you have the rest of your life for things like this. don't waste your eduction.
Anna x

[les]

You must know you are not her only cash piggy.

"She" has no concern if you pay or not.

Are you receiving one on one real-time interaction?

If not her correspondence has been honed to elicit as much of your money from you
With as little effort on herpart as possible.
While making you feel you need to maximise you cash and effort.
I can not understand paying someone for no personal interaction.

Remember "She" may be a manipulative male or female con artist.

I think it was "Nikki" who said if the picture looks like a porn star the picture is of a porn star
Or as a friend of mine once quipped.
Its like "http://www.airfix.com/"
Your model may differ,
To the picture on the box.

[Bindo]

Any addiction is very very hard to get out of.

The following pretentious advice is all just my experience, nothing scientific.

The thing with addiction is that you don't want to stop doing it - maybe part of you does, maybe sometimes you do and sometimes you don't - maybe you feel you should. But you don't really, fully want to stop the thing you're doing that you're unhappy with.

You have to work out to what extent you want to stop submitting to findommes, and what exactly your ideal situation would be. A little here and there? A particular lady you'd love to belong to, etc. And you have to be really, properly honest with yourself.

Also, quitting anything takes a lot of time and effort. If you're going to break an addiction - like smoking or drinking or overeating - you have to really go into it, having steeled yourself, and having made honest, serious plans.

I've always felt that a compulsive sexual submission is a particularly tricky thing to quit - simply because part of it is being weak-willed and following orders. To quit, you suddenly have to become strong and defy those you enjoy obeying. It's a major personality change as well as day-to-day behaviour change.



Well, obviously I don't know very much about your own problem. Here I'm making a lot of assumptions based on how I've felt and conversations I've had with other people.

But if you really do want to stop paying findommes, then I really do wish you the best. Keep at it, and try to 'master' yourself, you know?

[les]

It

All

Boils

Down

To


If you really want to do something you will find away do it.

If you really want to stop something you will find away to stop it.

If you really think you can get away with something you will do it thinking you are safe and sound.

What do you really want to do? ? ?

Not what do you merely hope or wish or dream of.

These are facts of life rarely mentioned.
Think about them they are true.


Les

[EternalLust]

Why don't you spend your money on some girl freind? not in a financial domination way but in a making her happy way. Giving a girl a great deal of what you have ( money, time, effort, ... ) is normal male behavior, and that is what those websites rely on. Personnally I like taking care of the girls I like and being generous with them even if I know there is nothing in return, but I never let it become compulsive. And you CAN do it. You only have to think that everytime you take care of a girl (maybe just helping her with something she's cariying or giving her a ride home) is offering something to her. At least she will enjoy it personnaly and be thanksful because she knows you personnally but still doesn't know that this is some (selfish) fetish. While website girls maybe fake, and they just enjoy the money thinking you are some low-estem loser they are legally "stealing".

And for your small dick it is not a real issue beleive me, especially if you are willing to pay . First lot's of girls are would be willing to go out with you and forget about your penis sze if you are generous with them (you don't need to pay them directly, just be a gentelman). Second all girls don't care about penis size, for a lot of them love is much more important, just find one of those. Third , well, some people think they penis is way to small while it is quiet everage; if there are a lot of "small penis humiliation" websites it is because there are a lot like you.

So get some self-estem and get to know real girls, let them be your fantasie, at least they deserve your generosity more than some unknow business people. And maybe you should stop seeking porn website because they all have those penis inlargement publicity and they make you feel small (and that is exactly their job, as much as the findommes). And lastly if it is really too small, just train your tongue as a subtitute.

What ever problems you have or don't have there is always a solution, find what you are good at and let it higher your self-estem, the one main thing that make a man sexy is self-estem. If you are smart enough to see your problem and write about it you are worthy enough of being a man and getting a beautiful girl to fall for you, just look at those who like you not those who don't.

[Vinny Vodka]

The real question is.... do you want to stop? Or do you just want to pretend that you cannot stop? I'll give you the power to stop, it's up to you to use it.

The power to stop lies in your imagination. The next time, and any future time you think about paying your "penis tax", or doing anything else that you don't want to do, close your eyes. Use your imagination to the best of your ability and visualize as vividly as you can your grandfather turning around dropping his pants. See him backing his hairy wrinkly, wart-covered butt right in your face and feel the whoosh of methane and the wet splash as he lets go and defecates all over you. Any movement you make towards paying a penis tax causes your grandfathers wrinkly, wart-covered butt to get larger and larger, moving ever closer to swallowing your face entirely as steaming hot piles of green slimy diahrea pour continuously out of it. Back away from it, and the flow stops and he pulls up his pants. Move towards it again and it happens again.

So... do you want to do it now?

[herlilbitch]

Why don't you spend your money on some girl freind? not in a financial domination way but in a making her happy way. Giving a girl a great deal of what you have ( money, time, effort, ... ) is normal male behavior, and that is what those websites rely on. Personnally I like taking care of the girls I like and being generous with them even if I know there is nothing in return, but I never let it become compulsive. And you CAN do it. You only have to think that everytime you take care of a girl (maybe just helping her with something she's cariying or giving her a ride home) is offering something to her. At least she will enjoy it personnaly and be thanksful because she knows you personnally but still doesn't know that this is some (selfish) fetish. While website girls maybe fake, and they just enjoy the money thinking you are some low-estem loser they are legally "stealing".

And for your small dick it is not a real issue beleive me, especially if you are willing to pay . First lot's of girls are would be willing to go out with you and forget about your penis sze if you are generous with them (you don't need to pay them directly, just be a gentelman). Second all girls don't care about penis size, for a lot of them love is much more important, just find one of those. Third , well, some people think they penis is way to small while it is quiet everage; if there are a lot of "small penis humiliation" websites it is because there are a lot like you.

So get some self-estem and get to know real girls, let them be your fantasie, at least they deserve your generosity more than some unknow business people. And maybe you should stop seeking porn website because they all have those penis inlargement publicity and they make you feel small (and that is exactly their job, as much as the findommes). And lastly if it is really too small, just train your tongue as a subtitute.

What ever problems you have or don't have there is always a solution, find what you are good at and let it higher your self-estem, the one main thing that make a man sexy is self-estem. If you are smart enough to see your problem and write about it you are worthy enough of being a man and getting a beautiful girl to fall for you, just look at those who like you not those who don't.

This this this! I have a few pretty sexy girls that I hang out with and I absolutely love spending money/ doing things for them. I usually only get to do small things like buy them drinks at the bar or drive them somewhere they need to go or whatever. I would love to do something bigger, say like buy a girl a coach purse... but I don't know how to go about that without being creepy. Any suggestions?

[dr.d]

find out when her birthday is and surprise her

[blueballboy]

I adamantly agree with the previous postings, find a mistress that gives you personal one-one-one contact and still takes your money to pamper herself.
Over the years, many femdoms have popped into the scene and pushed the financial domination angle, but because there was little else to their tactics, they have since faded into the darkness.
Personally, I serve Adore Kristina, who often contributes here on milovana. She takes my tributes through gifts, because she loves to be pampered. In the last few years I have given her purses, perfume, shoes, bikinis and a whole lot of lingerie- and it feels phenomenal each time I see her wearing something that I gave her.
My humble advice is to find a mistress that you can make a personal connection with, and she can be the one to guide your fetish into a new direction. If you're used to a femdom treating you like crap and taking your cash, you need a strong power to pull you to another place.

good luck buddy!

[les]

In reality it is the sub that is the that has the the final say.
Unless you are imprisoned.

The ultimate joy for a sub,
Is not having to decide.

If you have to ,
This is not for you.

You want your dom/me to love you.
not despise you.

Les

[jayjaysub]

I can tell you how I got out of it....

I was tributing online with Princess Jen. She's definitely a real girl and has one of the most popular financial domination clips on youtube -- it was made over two years ago. Anyway, I started talking with her online and began to regularly make tributes by buying things off her Amazon wish list. This went on for several months and then she disappeared all together for a year... then she returned and I began again and specifically asked her when we could meet in person...

She said that we would definitely meet before Christmas (which was about two months away). Through texts and online chats we narrowed it down to December 17th. She wanted this new flash for her camera which cost around $250 dollars. I told her that I would buy it and bring it with me to give to her upon meeting face-to-face. She talked with me up until about 3 days before and then completely disappeared and refused to talk with me. About three weeks later she sent me a text saying that her computer was down and could only now respond. I immediately asked when we would meet... and she did not respond. I haven't heard from her since... it's been 8 months.

Long story short is that I no longer give ANY money to ANYBODY without meeting first. If I'm going to give gifts to somebody I want something in return... something in person. Since that time I have found that there are some women who like you to clean their house, run their errands, detail their car, pay for their groceries, have me cook for them etc... and in return for doing this I pay them... not a huge amount... and that gives me a sense of feeling valued and turned on by being able to please them.

So I don't really know how you can break the pattern -- but it comes down to this:

When the pain of giving money for nothing in return outweighs the pleasure you get from it... that is when you will stop.

[les]

I can tell you how I got out of it....

I was tributing online with Princess Jen. She's definitely a real girl and has one of the most popular financial domination clips on youtube -- it was made over two years ago. Anyway, I started talking with her online and began to regularly make tributes by buying things off her Amazon wish list. This went on for several months and then she disappeared all together for a year... then she returned and I began again and specifically asked her when we could meet in person...

She said that we would definitely meet before Christmas (which was about two months away). Through texts and online chats we narrowed it down to December 17th. She wanted this new flash for her camera which cost around $250 dollars. I told her that I would buy it and bring it with me to give to her upon meeting face-to-face. She talked with me up until about 3 days before and then completely disappeared and refused to talk with me. About three weeks later she sent me a text saying that her computer was down and could only now respond. I immediately asked when we would meet... and she did not respond. I haven't heard from her since... it's been 8 months.

Long story short is that I no longer give ANY money to ANYBODY without meeting first. If I'm going to give gifts to somebody I want something in return... something in person. Since that time I have found that there are some women who like you to clean their house, run their errands, detail their car, pay for their groceries, have me cook for them etc... and in return for doing this I pay them... not a huge amount... and that gives me a sense of feeling valued and turned on by being able to please them.

So I don't really know how you can break the pattern -- but it comes down to this:

When the pain of giving money for nothing in return outweighs the pleasure you get from it... that is when you will stop.

Its a shame it hurts before you know it.
So many con artist want money for nothing.
The only person to ever give you a "free lunch" is your mum!!
But she would like a kiss/cuddle/thank you.



Les

[camel]

Anyone with sexual addiction should read "Out of the Shadows" by Patrick Carnes. It's a really good book that, while outlining some extreme cases, uses them to illustrate the cycle of addiction as applied to sexual addictions.

It doesn't really answer "How" to break the cycle, but it certainly explains why it's so hard, and understanding really REALLY helps.

Good luck.