Edging and ruin orgasm

[Airwreck0]

I'll admit I really enjoy edging, but I can't understand why anyone would want to ruin an orgasm.
Can someone help me understand?

[kyrex90]

Because after you ruin your orgasm you don't lose your horny/gooned state, and you can keep going with porn. And it feels nice too.

[Airwreck0]

Huh.. really... Cuz the times I have ruined an orgasm.. it is like thinking your gonna get a mouthful of chocolate but you really get a mouthful of raw cocoa..
Where with a good orgasm.. I just need to catch my breath.. mind is good to go but the equipment may not.
I guess this really a great case of different strokes for different folks..

[Shattered]

Because after you ruin your orgasm you don't lose your horny/gooned state, and you can keep going with porn. And it feels nice too.

I don't really get this, a ruin is the end.

But it plays into the submissive side. If a dom gains pleasure from your ruin, then you ruin. Simple as that.

And you can play to that fantasy in teases.

[Roblsforbobls]

Because after you ruin your orgasm you don't lose your horny/gooned state, and you can keep going with porn. And it feels nice too.

Some teases are written with the implication that people can keep going after a ruin, and it's something I've never understood. Like Shattered said, a ruin is definitely the end of my session, just like a regular orgasm would be. The only difference I see is I'm still unsatisfied and horny after a ruin. Still can't keep going because of the refractory period...

[Helequin]

So, there's definitely different reasons you might want to ruin an orgasm. The most common is of course in D/S where the sub is ruined for the pleasure of the Dom(me). It can be a punishment or just a way to show devotion and control. Ruins can also be part of fantasy for forced orgasms and the like.

There are other creative reasons people might enjoy too. I'm not the best at controlling a ruin so I can do it over and over (see below), but if I was I would absolutely use that in a dominant role to say, cum on my sub's face several times in quick succession . Like most other things, once you know what the sensation is like it's up to your own creativity to get the fun out of it. And of course, some things just aren't for some people.

As for ruin being the end or not, my experience has also been there are different degrees of how ruined an orgasm can be. It's definitely possible to ruin an orgasm, leak a bunch of cum and not enter a refractory period at all. I've done this before, but I have to be very careful to get it right. It requires me to go slow and be very careful about where the edge is and to stop all stimulation even before I think I would need to. I also have to actually try and will my body to calm down, or just the muscle clenches can be enough to push the ruin just that bit too far. It's also critical for me to just not touch until I'm absolutely certain the ruin is done. Even once I've stopped cumming, if I try to start stroking too quickly I'll get a little jolt of pleasure and then fall into a refractory period. So for me, it's hands off for a minute or two.

Even just a little bit too much stimulation and I'll end up having a ruined orgasm that doesn't really feel any better, but does trigger a refractory period. For me, the period is usually quite a bit shorter (say 5-10 min) than it would be after a full orgasm (15-20 min) before I can edge again.

[kyrex90]

Because after you ruin your orgasm you don't lose your horny/gooned state, and you can keep going with porn. And it feels nice too.

Some teases are written with the implication that people can keep going after a ruin, and it's something I've never understood. Like Shattered said, a ruin is definitely the end of my session, just like a regular orgasm would be. The only difference I see is I'm still unsatisfied and horny after a ruin. Still can't keep going because of the refractory period...

If you can't keep up after ruined orgasm it means you're doing it wrong. And just because you can't properly ruin it doesn't mean it has no purpose. :)

[MilanWindictive]

for me (as a cumslut fantazy guy) its really hard for me to eat cum with full orgasm. so whenever i have a mistress i tell her in advance to ruin me if she wants me to eat it.

and yes, as it was mentioned there are several types of ruined orgms. i count three:
easy - u stop when u start cumming. (most of the cum spills out)
medium - tease slower and stop right at the edge just before u start to feel the cum commin out (lets say half of your cum goes out and u may be still a bit horny)
hard - teasing very slowly and very, very lightly on the edge feeling you are about to cum but the tease is so light and slow u think ull never reach it. u do one more touch and just a tiny bit of sperm barely leaks out. this may feel great as you are feeling the "release" for a bit longer, not losing appetite nor erection. yet it requres a lot of control and maybe a bit of practice as it may not be pleasurable for first-timers

[Roblsforbobls]

If you can't keep up after ruined orgasm it means you're doing it wrong. And just because you can't properly ruin it doesn't mean it has no purpose. :)

for me (as a cumslut fantazy guy) its really hard for me to eat cum with full orgasm. so whenever i have a mistress i tell her in advance to ruin me if she wants me to eat it.

hard - teasing very slowly and very, very lightly on the edge feeling you are about to cum but the tease is so light and slow u think ull never reach it. u do one more touch and just a tiny bit of sperm barely leaks out. this may feel great as you are feeling the "release" for a bit longer, not losing appetite nor erection. yet it requres a lot of control and maybe a bit of practice as it may not be pleasurable for first-timers

Thanks for making this distinction. I always thought a ruined orgasm is taking yourself to the edge and stopping all stimulation just as you tip over the edge - doing that always triggers my refractory period. That sounds like the "Medium" one that you described.

But I have also at times edged myself pretty hard and gotten extremely close, which resulted in a little bit of cum leaking out but was otherwise identical to a normal edge for me in that the refractory period was not triggered. I just want to confirm, is that what people usually refer to as a "ruined orgasm"?

[Helequin]

But I have also at times edged myself pretty hard and gotten extremely close, which resulted in a little bit of cum leaking out but was otherwise identical to a normal edge for me in that the refractory period was not triggered. I just want to confirm, is that what people usually refer to as a "ruined orgasm"?

I've experienced edges like this too, and to me they aren't ruined orgasms. Actually for me this almost always happens with the first edge of a session .

The reason I don't really count them as ruins is as you said it feels exactly like an edge and usually there's only a very small amount of cum. It doesn't cause the feeling of utter disappointment a proper ruin brings in my experience. So to me it's distinct from that "perfect" ruin where a stream of cum leaks out and that disappointing feeling really sinks in but still doesn't trigger a refractory period.