Along came the Summer of 2011 the end of one D/s relationship and the search for another began. She wasn't looking for anything deep, she just wanted some fun, some play and to be wanted. The reality though was that the more of herself she gave, the deeper she fell down the rabbit hole. The day he told her in the chatroom that the lyrics from Linkin' Park's Faint reminded him of her, she thought she had died and gone to heaven - " I am what I want you to want what I want you to feel". She wanted to feel everything he would give her. She was home and in him found the dominant that she needed.
A need to serve and the immense pleasure she got from it, drove her to love and cherish him. She was blind to everything else, just driven by a need to please him above anything else. Some would say she was foolish but her motivations were real and driven by her heart. She was ruled by her heart in her every desire to give him more and more. The memories they shared together – her first caning - after a bad experience with a former Dom, days spent talking about their hopes and dreams, oh so many spankings, cathartic tears after intense scenes, kneeling on the dirty floors in public toilets carrying out his tasks.
The connection grew and grew and she couldn’t imagine a day without him holding her leash, even though the miles separated them. She had found the only one that she had ever been able to truly let go to. The only one who she really felt safe with. The only one who truly got to understand her hidden depths and treat her as she had craved for so long. The four years that they spent together held many memories and many firsts, but everything changes and late last year it was time for them both to move on.
Over the past few months she has worked through the demons in her head who told her that she wasn’t enough, as it is clear to see that she gave her all and some. She has no regrets of their time together and feels lucky that she was able to experience so much in a relationship which whilst in it she felt loved and wanted whatever mindset she was in at the time.
She fell in love with a person who didn’t exist, she saw the man she wanted, she saw someone that maybe he wanted to be but that he wasn’t and he could not sustain. They were very different people and there could be no happy ending this time.
So it is now that I say goodbye and goodnight to the fabulous snoopy as I re-invent myself for the future. I have loved everything that you brought me and I move forward with some very happy memories of the days of Snare & snoop.
As my first experience of online play with snoopy were on milo, I thought it was important to say goodbye to her here.
Love to all,
snoopy xXx
don't be a stranger xx you know where to contact me if you need a chat too. 
