Fulfilling Erotic Desires on a Budget

[CruelNatalie]

I've been tolling stuff around in my head after speaking to a few of my clients. Since so many of you are into tease, denial and cock control, I felt you would be the perfect candidates to have this dialogue. I'd love a man's perspective. If you would be so kind to answer the questions below. If you are shy please private message me here or [email protected] however open forum is great for continued discussion.

1) How often do you orgasm and what % is masturbation?

2) What do you do when you want to wank? Videos, phonesex, audio, free pictures, close your eyes?

3) How do you feel about paying a professional, such as myself for phone fantasy, keyholding, various erotic services? Please be honest and polite.

4) Do you have a budget for your erotic entertainment? This includes videos, strip clubs, phone sex etc.

5) Have you ever been to a professional dominatrix?

6) If in a relationship does your SO know about your erotic desires? If no, how do you fulfill these or do you? If yes, how does she feel about them and are you 100% open?

7) What paid services do you think would be great to fulfill your erotic desires?

8) What is your top two main turn-on's?

Thank you so very much.

Natalie

[precumdripper]

1) I normally orgasm very often, like once per day. However I do periods of orgasm denial to see how long I can go. I do these denial periods about once per month and they normally last 2-3 weeks. So I am denied for roughly one half of each month.

100% of my orgasms are from masturbation.

2) Videos, audios and close my eyes (in bed)

3) I am not against the idea, however I don't have the cash to do this, probably would if I had the cash.

4) No set budget, just when I have some extra cash every once in a while.

5) No, would love to but cant afford it.

6) Not in a relationship.

7) Professional dominatrix
Cock control phone sex

8) Orgasm control and female feet.

[denied_fate]

1) every other day, 100% masturbation

2) webteases, pictures, closing my eyes

3) if I could fit it into my budget then I wouldn't mind

4) I try to but often at times I simply can't fit it into my budget

5) No but I have considered it before

6) My relationship is complicated with my SO at the moment so I haven't told her yet. Not sure exactly how she would take it but I don't think it would ruin our relationship. I simply think now would not be a good time to talk with her about it.

7) Well I would say keyholding service, video chat, used undergarments, tasks to complete.

8) chastity and orgasm control

[CruelNatalie]

Thank you. I have some early morning appointments but will come back.

[CruelNatalie]

I will offer tips and of course if you have any feedback or questions I'm happy to answer.

I specialize in ongoing control programs making myself available via email, phone and audio. My point with this is that I have found that building a dynamic with my "client" is something we both enjoy, however there could also be some challenges with this bond. Some guys get obsessed. Maybe it's the excitement of finally having someone who understands and someone to share their taboo needs with. But finding the right balance is so very important in fitting this into your already existing lifestyle. It's best to discuss this openly with whoever you chose to "help" you fulfill these fantasies. Let them know that you're serious but that you have a budget and I prefer someone tell me what their budget it so I can help them. I'm looking for long term not to take what I can and exit. All of my relationships are important to me including professional.

If you look closer at your budget, sit down and write it out. You'd be amazed at the stupid shit you spend money on. (damn this would be a great post for my blog lol) I'm only using examples because everyone is different. My example is a young guy I have who is on a fixed income of 2000.00 a month. Since I took complete control (sissy) I helped him shop, created a diet for him because he was spending 150.00 a week just eating out. He was also spending a few dollars a day drinking soda. He made time to shop and stopped drinking soda. He lost 20 pounds the first month! He also found 75.00 a week in his budget. So what can you do with 75.00 a week???? What would you do? Wouldn't you rather have an explosive orgasm then drink sofa? lol

So we set him up on a program, some audios and two 15 min calls a month. The extra money he was able to even buy a few sex toys saving any extra money! Before he was eating poorly, blowing his money on single phone sex sessions with NO control. He had trouble paying his rent some months. Now he is amazed how much more fulfilling his sexual journey is. He has even started working out! Last week he let me see him on cam all dressed up in an outfit we found at good will. He was so proud and it is also a very rewarding thing for me because I get many of my needs met; earn an income doing what I love, being in control and helping another human being to be happier.

It's totally fine if your needs are met using free pics and such. I am not trying to convert or sell anyone. I just love the feed back and if I can help you great.

[CruelNatalie]

anyone else? Come on don't be shy!

[CruelNatalie]

I wanted to thank everyone who submitted a private response. Some of the replies were very interesting and helped me greatly. I hope you will consider posting comments to my blog where I also posted this. It's helpful for my business and traffic. I know that some of you frown on women who turn all of this into a business, It's important for me to not only be professional but offer a truly valuable service doing what I love to do. What many don't realize is that as a woman I become empowered and evolve learning more about myself as I help others discover their own needs.

Reading the replies I was thinking that it would be so cool to have a truly female operated monitoring program by women who really did understand tease and denial/cock control and chastity.

[CruelNatalie]

Thank you JP.

[CruelNatalie]

6) If in a relationship does your SO know about your erotic desires? If no, how do you fulfill these or do you? If yes, how does she feel about them and are you 100% open?

Yep. We toy with chastity, although she only does it because I want it and doesn't get into it. I'm 100% open, but after we tried it out for a while I realized that I enjoy just playing with femdom and not living it. There's something to be said for both lifestyles, but it's harder for us to both be Mistress + Slave and have an equal say in things. I love our relationship as peers and after a 6 month or so stint on the Mistress + Slave have also decided it isn't something to do forever. Now we just toy with it for a couple days when she wants to.

The other reason I'm happy with this is my family has a history of prostate cancer and all of the new research says frequent masturbation is a very good way to lower your risk of it.

I think this in itself is a great topic. I'm going to present this at my blog but will also post here.

I can't tell you how many guys tell me that their wife or girlfriend will do it but isn't personally into it. Since the whole dynamic is based on feminine control it's not the same if she is serving up your needs like an actress. For that matter you might as well hire a phone sex operator or sex professional because at least they will have a clue if not experts on the subject.

I personally enjoy an ongoing femdom dynamic but it didn't happen overnight. Although its hard to merge already existing relationships it's certainly not impossible. The biggest mistake I see being made is how a guy tells her and then how he follows through. If she isn't allowed the time to tap "what's in it for me" then chances are she'll shoot it down entirely.

There is no reason you can't also have fun with femdom fantasy, make it exciting and part of your already existing lifestyle. Most people do this.

More on this later.

[CruelNatalie]

some tips...


It's ok to email an online or phone mistress to see if she is interested in the same things you are or experienced in providing a service on that topic. When you write her don't approach her in fantasy mode. Write an intelligent straight forward email. Its best to get to the point and tell her exactly what you are looking for. If you want to close your eyes and imagine then tel her this but if you want her to guide you, have you hang from the ceiling be clear that you need this. If something is off limits then say so. In your email you can also tell her how much time you like to allow for calls.

Tip two- 10 min calls suck but if it's really all you can afford then plan ahead. Email and arrange the call so she knows you have limited funds or time. Don't be embarrassed. At then same time don't try to cram a bunch of stuff into a 10 min call. Don't get me wrong... I am fine with 10 min calls WHEN I have been working with someone and we email ahead or I teach them how to start the call. But when you are meeting someone for the first time it can be cumbersome. You'd be better off saving, buying some audios and then some calls here and there. If you work closely with your "professional" she can help you with.

A professional has good feedback. When you email her she replies back in a reasonable amount of time. He price may be a little higher then most but you really do get what you pay for. Do your homework when your dick isn't hard. lol Visit her web site, blog, etc. Try to get a sense of her. When you do contact her be polite and respectful. A good professional wants to help you even if the two of you are not compatible.If she is only interested in getting you off and taking your money then she is not a good professional or interested in a relationship. Building a good relationship with your erotic providers saves you time and ultimately money.

If you're not interested in paid service, that's cool and your choice.

[CruelNatalie]

BTW I have some great replies at my blog if anyone is interested.

http://dominantmistressphonesex.com/201 ... -a-budget/