FINISHED

All about the past, current and future webteases and the art of webteasing in general.
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reflog1
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FINISHED

Post by reflog1 »

hello all.....i have finished a series....i will go day by day when i upload them.... as you would assume when someone write's a tease. of course they want feedback... so if people read the series. my question is............are my teases easy to follow or do you get lost sometimes when reading the series...
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Re: FINISHED

Post by Finlander »

Hey,

I didn't read the full (first part of the) tease, but here are some tips I came up with while skimming through it:

1. Remember, grammar is very important when it comes to making a tease. The first character of a sentence should always be capitalized.

2. You seem to use "..." too often instead of ",", ":" or "-". This makes the text look and sound weird.

3. Also, don't confuse "your" and you're"!



Here's the first page with these points in mind:

"This is the main character, Eddy.
You play a successful businessman and live in beautiful Miami, Florida.
You deal with marketing but you're a jack of all trades kind of guy. You're very social and have some close friends. You just got out of a 2 year relationship - things just didn't work out.

You're looking for a relationship but aren't in any rush to get back into committing again. You want to hit the clubs and chill with friends."



4. This one is just personal preference, but I like teases better if the main character isn't named or pictured. This way I can imagine it's me, instead of feeling like I am stalking on some one else's life.
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I hope you find these tips helpful. As for the grammar, there are many programs and browser add-ons to help with that, for example this one: https://chrome.google.com/webstore/deta ... aegchjmoea
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deamon44
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Re: FINISHED

Post by deamon44 »

4. This one is just personal preference, but I like teases better if the main character isn't named or pictured. This way I can imagine it's me, instead of feeling like I am stalking on some one else's life.
I agree. I find it difficult to enjoy a tease if theres a constant reminder that you are not the character. It takes you out of the story and is much less immersive.
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