To tease or be teased...

[cumhardy]

I just like perverted sex!

I used to be totally sub and all about being teased and controlled but last couple of years Ive definately felt my dominant side coming through, and like to be a bit evil!

Ive never been with a guy but the idea of teasing a guy is more of a turn on to me than teasing a girl...does that sound weird?
However I would only want to be teased by a girl in real life.

Like I said in a previous posts, im not good at picking kinky girls so a lot of my fantasies and tastes are purely imaginary!

[Dath85]

I prefer to be teased but in my last (sexual) relationship I found myself the more dominant. My own doing really, I took an innocent young girl and lovingly turned her into the sexual partner I (thought I) craved. It made more sense for me to be in control while she was being introduced to my perversions and by the time we had reached our limits M/f, it was as if she depended on me too much to ever go the other way.

I laugh as I write this, she once spanked my balls while bringing me to orgasm and it *hurt*. I had one of the most powerful orgasms and she sobbed into my shoulder saying how sorry she was for making me yelp in pain (Not at all funny in itself! But you understand why it made me laugh I hope!). Just one of those things I guess...

For me the thought of a woman who is: kinky enough to enjoy teasing me; intelligent enough to do it properly; and so unbelievably in-tune with my body to know exactly how far to push which buttons to keep me always guessing.... Its such an enormous turn on. I feel like I'm pretty good at doing it to a woman, not perfect - and I have some major faults of my own - but good :)

... but so far I've failed in my search to find someone like that in return. So that's why I'm at this site! :)

[wonderbo]

I find it relatively easy to slip into either role. I think my preference is the submissive role, but the lines are a little blurry for me. My wife and I are both assertive outside of the bedroom, but tend to become much quieter with our clothes off. She is very conservative about sex and outspoken about the things that she wants no part of...and that she doesn't want me to have any part of. Among them are participation or communication with others about sex, and porn. She does give a really great handjob (sometimes accompanied by a blowjob). She'll draw it out and keep me on the edge for 30 minutes or so. I know this is nothing compared to some of the stories I've heard in here, but it's good.

I think I got off topic.

Anyway, in previous relationships I was generally more dominant sexually than I am with my wife now. Even early on in my marriage I was more dominant. I think the first time she found porn on my computer is when things started to change that way. She was very upset and I've never felt like I had the power I had before. So now I'm more submissive. I enjoy that role...but she is not necessarily very dominant. I hope I'm making sense.

[Lindsey]

Some very nice answers here. Only 2 more and I get to contribute. ;)

-L

[pslion24]

Which do you honestly prefer and why?

Noone is completely submissive or completely dominant. Let's hear the reasoning behind what turns you on. ;) Tell us about experiences that have affected you.

When the thread accumulates 20 answers from unique users, i'll contribute my answer. ;)

-L

I would say the majority of the time I like to be the one being teased. Although if the girl I happen to be with likes giving up control I can definitely have some fun doing the teasing. I LOVE pleasing girls and it can be a lot of fun to get a girl close and watch her struggle when you don't take her over the edge and then the intense pleasure she feels when you finally do.

The story behind my realization that I liked being teased goes back a few years to a girlfriend I had in high school who had a thing for getting me turned in public. After a while realizing that I liked it too it became very easy for ger to get me hard in nearly any situation include sitting across from me at lunch in school and slipping her shoe off and rubbing her sock covered foot on my inner thigh or a simple as whispering something in my ear to get me going.

I went to a catholic high school and had to wear tan dress pants and one time she got me going so bad that I had a VERY obvious pre-cum spot showing on my pants which forced me to leave school early. Don't worry though she left with me, and that was by far the most fun I ever had skipping class

[subboytom]

Drifting in the direction of the original question, I fantasize about both roles. In fact, I fantasize about damn near everything; I'm a student, so I have lots of time on my hands, and a very high libido. I do tend to favour being submissive, partly I think out of sexual inexperience and consequent timidity, and partly because I'm fairly often the organised leader in everyday life. I'd certainly like a go at being in charge though.

[Quazwierdcev283]

Lindsey,
You got your twenty posts and never replied. I personally am very interested in your reply to the question you posed. Waiting for your reply . . . if you're still around.

[Lindsey]

Lindsey,
You got your twenty posts and never replied. I personally am very interested in your reply to the question you posed. Waiting for your reply . . . if you're still around.

Fair enough...noone asked for it. ;)

It's a difficult question for me to answer, which is why I was curious to hear other peoples' thoughts. I think I tend to be on the aggressive side more often, as it's honestly what turns most guys on. I enjoy that for a lot of reasons. I like being in control of someone's sensations, their feelings, their pleasure...and lack thereof. ;) I like pushing someone's buttons and asking them intimate questions about how it makes them feel...paying attention to their responses to what i'm doing to them.

And I think my favorite part about it is figuring out what a guy wants...all of a sudden a little light goes on in my head and I think, "hmmm, *that's* what you want right now...mmm, the fun i'm going to have making you want it even more..." ;) I just find it so pleasurable to get inside someone's head like that and taking control of their desires. I take it as a big form form of flattery, as I believe you need to have respect for someone in order to take a submissive role to them. When a guy lets me have my way with him, he's not only trusting that I know what to do to make him feel good, he's trusting that I can do it for him better than he can for himself. He's trusting that I won't hurt him, or anything else bad. I often like to play head games to shake that trust a little, make him feel a bit uneasy...make him feel that even though I know what he wants, I might take enough pleasure in *not* giving it to him to go through with that. ;) It's always fun to find ways to make a guy think that maybe, just maybe, i'm pure evil and I only acted sweet to lure him in. I wouldn't hurt a fly, but for some reason, I get off on making a guy *think* that I might be evil enough to torment him worse than he could even think up in his own head. I rarely actually *do* that though, only when I know it's what a guy actually wants. I've only dated one person like that. The rest, it's just fun to make them worry about it. ;)

And I think I like being teased and submitting to someone just as much, though in a different way. I've always gotten off on being physically overpowered, and that honestly turns me on quite a bit. I like being held down, grabbed, shoved around, ect. As aggressive as I can get, i'm still 5'5" and not much over 100lbs, and it's always a bit of a stimulating feeling to be reminded of that when i'm with a guy. It embarrasses me to say, but I do like being treated rough sometimes. There's something so black and white about being physically overpowered or tied up, it turns me on. When a guy is just acting aggressive and maybe trying to overpower me mentally, and teasing me that way...I can find a way out. I can turn things around on him. But it turns me on to think about how I can't get out of the situation if i'm tied up, and how i'm not strong enough to fight back against him physically.

One situation that made me have an orgasm more intense than most anything else I remember was when my ex boyfriend had me tied up and fingered me after I already had an intense orgasm from penetration. I didn't even let him know what he was doing, as he wasn't really into to the idea of hardcore teasing. But he knew I liked to have a guy's hand over my mouth during sex a lot. He was fingering me, with his other hand covering my mouth. I was on my back on the bed with my hands tied together and secured above me. He was rubbing my clit and I was *way* overstimulated. All I could do was squirm under him, pulling against the belt wrapped around my wrists, kicking my hips around under his hand. He thought he was just making me feel very good. To me, it was torment...but I got *unbelievably* hot about the fact that I couldn't do anything to get out of the situation.

And once, I had an experience with a girl. She completely dominated the sexual dynamic between us and had me eating out of her hand in a matter of minutes...then left. The feeling of being toyed with like that...i'm sitting at work right now at my bench, with my legs crossed, acting like i'm typing a report, and i'm dripping wet just thinking about it.

I love both sides of things, maybe even equally. But for different reasons, obviously. ;)

-L