random things I HATE about porn clips/vids

[cockheroaddict]

No matter whether it is during a full length video, a short clip, or on a tube site these are things I absolutely HATE when it comes to modern day porn:

- Guys talking unseen in the background asking stupid questions to the girl, especially in that quiet whispered voice
- The camera moving around all the time needlessly, just stay still for a minute dammit !
- Obviously fake unfelt moaning that goes on and on and on
- Masturbation videos when every girl uses a dildo or vibrator.Every single one.Does anyone just use their hands and fingers anymore or what ?
- Bruises on girls that you actually see in the video
- Really stupid music.

Okay so I am picky.

[janmb]

With you all the way on those

You can add horribly, poorly faked orgasms to that list too - as an addition to the false moaning I guess.

[CHbr]

Or the fake cum.

[assfan69]

....and I am picky, too, I admit:

I hate the same scene being played over and over again. There are some really good vids, where u r actually surprised by unusual camera angles, changes in procedures and interesting models and places.
Like with good movies I remember those vids for a long time - others just come and go like fast food.

[Pontos]

- Guys talking unseen in the background asking stupid questions to the girl, especially in that quiet whispered voice

That is why I can't stand porn with this Manuel Ferrara guy. He is always whispering.

Pimple on ass, vulva or face are a turn-off for me too.... or even very small cocks. Or fat hairy guys.... And the worst: when the guy is on his feet and fucks the kneeling girl from behind and the cam is also filming from behind, so you get to see the asshole of the guy. Who wants to see that in a straight porn movie???

[VanHellsing]

Everything above + closeups on a guy's face every couple minutes.

[flash]

I'll go out of the normal realm of what people have said, to something I know some people like:

I can't stand fake boobs. The big round ones that look like inflated balloons are a huge turn off to me. I can kind of understand why some guys like them, but for me it's almost instant turn off.

In fact, I feel like I get a big advantage in most cock heroes because 1/2 of the rounds are of women with huge balloons flopping around and it's easy for me not to cum.

I will say, I do like big boobs. If they look natural (and maybe some surgeons can do this well enough that I can't tell), I like them a lot. But I also really like small, natural boobs, and think it's a shame that some people replace them with floppy ones.

Oh, also, the overly excessive makeup can be bad. Maybe it's just poorly done makeup, but I guess that fits in my theme of not liking things that are obviously fake.

[SexualChoc]

I hate
how they digitize out h\the dick or make the pussy look like fuzz
I mean it is drawn hentai anyway..
I mean I know its for japan.. but really??
do we really need to see a big pink square???

[flash]

I hate
how they digitize out h\the dick or make the pussy look like fuzz
I mean it is drawn hentai anyway..
I mean I know its for japan.. but really??
do we really need to see a big pink square???

I couldn't agree with you more, being into Asians slightly more than other races. I really wish Japan would stop doing this sort of thing, or that other countries (looking at you China) would produce more porn for western audiences.

[FicklePickleTickle]

Mostly in reply to Flash:

I know exactly what you're talking about. The fake boobs or the too much makeup look is a serious turnoff for me too. I can make it completely through many of the Cock Hero movies, even some of the very challenging ones because of this.

That porn star/stripper look is a bad look in my opinion and it takes me out of the moment. My mind immediately goes to, "I hope this moves on to someone hot soon." I guess it would be the equivalent of taking like a 10 minute break to recover between a round, but essentially in the middle of a round.

As this may come across as complaining, I will be clear at this point. Yes, I'm aware that everyone has different tastes and, yes, that look is a turn on for many other people, so I'm not suggesting that anyone change their style or anything. Also, I do not have the time to make my own, and if I did, I probably still wouldn't do so. There are some CH's that I have trouble getting through because they are done the way that I would do them, so it works out for me. Hopefully that's clear.

As far as the original question goes, one of the things that bothers me the most about porn is that they all seem to follow the same basic setup. A lot of them are the same scenes basically with different people on screen. Those of you who are into the JOE/JOI type clips are well aware of this. That's probably the biggest offender. The girls tend to say the same lines or do the same things, it's just a different girl on camera. They can be fun and more interactive than other clips, but at the same time, there's a bit of a if-you've-seen-one-you've-seen-them-all type of feeling to it. It's really about picking your favorite girl and going with that. The same applies to other clips in other genres. It's usually more about how hot you think the girl is, or girls, as the case may be.

How many times have we seen the same sequence of positions in different clips? You can almost predict it beforehand. I wish they'd mix it up or let the performers just go at it once in awhile just for a change of pace.

Just my two cents. :D

[Tury]

Not much more I can add to this list... How about when a girl tries to "discretely" spit out the cum in her mouth.

Or how Asian girls "moaning" sounds more like they are in pain?

[Nezhul]

I hate
- all outdoor scenes. kills the video right away if they are in the garden or on the nature.
- all music during action. It's fine when the dirl dances stripping, but not during actual sex or masturbation.
- Weird camerawork. This covers a lot, from always moving jerky camera, to scenes where camera always shows only parts of the scene, and not the whole picture.
- bruices, scratches, any other defects.
- I'm no racist but I dislike any non-european-looking actors, which covers both boys and girls, and pretty much any race from asian to black. Just don't get a kick out of it at all, it's as if there's nothing sexy before me.
- ANY Pussy or cock piercings and too much of piercings in other places.
- Too much tatoo. Some girls have like third of a body coverd in tatoo.
- Hudge tits. For me there's a limit to how big the female breasts should be, and that limit is about (or a bit bigger) that I can grip in my hands (provided, though, I have pretty large palms). It's better completely flat chest than great big monster-mellons.
- I don't like fake-looking fake tits. I mean sometimes they look OK. But sometimes, ewww....
- Too much anal sex. Anal is OK to an extent, but when 80% boy-girl scenes end up in anal, and on top of it out of 10 minutes of penetration - 7 is anal, that's taking it too much.
- Strange stripping. Like when the girl looses her clothes but still wears shoes... or socks. goes for a guy too. I saw this vid where the guy got completely naked, except he still wore his socks and boots. Looks totally humorous. Like, how the hell did he get his pants off? Or did he come to the stage with a hilt on or something?
- Too long blowjob scenes that show only her face sucking cock. Really, cameraman, show something better too! Like how her body moves, some cool angles, how she rubs her pussy while she's sucking... ANYTHING!
- pussy licking scenes that are made for camera. I.e. actor's face to the side, and he uses tongue to flick pussy lips. You are doing it WRONG man! Give this clit a good suck! Who cares if you cover her pussy with your face for a minute!
- Unnatural and uncomfortable "showy" positions. I don't want fucking camasutra, I like just good ole fucking!
- The fact that studios don't use sexy underwear and costubes often. There's so much, yet 95% of videos feature casual clothes, casual (even if good) underwear, and all of this gets lost in 1 minute and she's naked.
- The lack of sweet and sensual, loving femdom. Seems like 99% femdom feature a kind of bitch or brat for a girl, who degrades men a lot and needs her mouth being washed with soap.
- Not enough good filmed kinks! Like even orgasm denial. You don't see many professional videos where a girl does nothing but edging a guy with her hands, pussy and mouth. And you have to HUNT, i say HUNT like hell for a videos where a girl is denied for at least a few minutes. And of course many other kinks are not filmed at all.

I'll stop at that.

[AliceInBondageLand]

Sounds like a lot of the reasons I started filming my own sex life.

[cumslut24]

Really cliched repetitive dialogue/encouragement especially in Dogfart IR scenes. It's got to the stage where I turn the sound off now.

Someone packing an enormous cock who doesn't make best use of it or insists on fucking with it painfully slowly. It's like watching a Maserati dawdle along at 20mph.

Male leads who insist on talking all the time, especially in British stuff. Please, shut the fuck up.

[Stair_Car]

Everything above + closeups on a guy's face every couple minutes.

Oh my God, I KNOW! Why on Earth do they do that? Have most porn directors never actually watched porn?