Oh you'd like this skirt down wouldn't you? Too bad, slut puppies like you don't get a little unless they give a lot! So let's see how dumb shit puppies like you stroke it! Yes, I know it must be awkward and unbalancing but I don't care. If you fall down a time or two you'll survive won't you?
Give yourself a good puppy stroke for the next 60 seconds. And if you fall on your fat ugly face you lost the rest of the time. Sorry loser, you'll just have to get better!