Actually, I like the way you look with your tongue hanging out with a bunch of clothespins dangling off of it. Keep them on! It makes you look even sluttier!
Now, I want you to take one of those sharpies and stick it into the back of your throat. Thrust that sharpie back and forth deep into your throat until it is fully lubed. Once it is, take it and slide it into your asshole as deep as it will go.
Take the second sharpie and repeat that procedure. Gag on it and then slide it into your ass next to the first sharpie. Once they are both snug inside your butt, shake your butt a little so that everyone can see how much you like having your ass stuffed.