Britani's Bitch
“Hah, listen to this!
‘Meanwhile, upon questioning him in his broken fashion, Queequeg gave me to understand that, in his land, owing to the absence of settees and sofas of all sorts, the king, chiefs, and great people generally, were in the custom of fattening some of the lower orders for ottomans; and to furnish a house comfortably in that respect, you had only to buy up eight or ten lazy fellows, and lay them round in the piers and alcoves. Besides, it was very convenient on an excursion; much better than those garden-chairs which are convertible into walking-sticks; upon occasion, a chief calling his attendant, and desiring him to make a settee of himself under a spreading tree, perhaps in some damp marshy place.’
That’s from ‘Moby Dick’!
Slaves being used as furniture in a piece of world literature! It doesn’t get any better than this!
Maybe I should talk to Goddess about following that tradition. Fattening you up even more than you already are, and using you as a permanent piece of furniture in the garden. We can keep you out here all the time and never have to worry about leaving the furniture out in the rain!”