Hey, focus! My eyes are up here. Aunt Nadia lives just a few miles away. I'll write down her address since I doubt you can remember. I am going to be nice and give you some advice. You should address her as Mistress Nadia and do exactly what she says to the letter. Oh, and one more thing. When you enter her apartment, you had better be on your knees. I'm calling her now so you better run along.
(Before you move on you need to gather some items:
1. A cardboard tube from an empty roll of toilette paper
2. A handful of pushpins
3. A short cord or shoe string
4. A tube of Icy Hot cream
5. A plastic glass
When you have these items you may . . .)