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My wife has zero libido. She claims that she doesnt even think about sex on a day to day basis. The only time anything ever happens is if I initiate, which is fine, but it woiuld be nice to have her initiate sometimes.

I do what I can to make her life easier (I do the majority of the cooking, cleaning, maintenance, etc) in the hope that it will allow her to relax more and thus get the urge occasionally, but all to no avail.

While this may sound ok on a denial front, not having any attention from your partner is quite depressing.

Any thoughts or comments greatfully accepted.

regards
svargen

I would start by talking with her about it. It can be difficult to do this but as with anything in a relationship there has to be give and take. Is she willing to work on starting things?

If she is you could do alot of little things to help remind her it's her turn to start things. Maybe you can agree on a number of times each week/month that she will start it. Exchange ideas about things you'd both like to try. You could help her at first by leaving a sexy note for her to read in the morning to let her know how she could start things when you two get home that afternoon. You could work out some sort of "I'm horny and I want you to come onto me tonight" code.

I'm sure there are many things you two can do. The first step is communicating so that she is aware that it's a problem the both of you need to work on. Next is finding out what you both can do to find a soultion.

The hard part will be if it's somthing she's not willing to work on. Hopefully this isn't the case. Either way talking it out in detail is the best way to go. Just be ready to meet her half way. It could be that she doesn't think you are attractive anymore or thinks you're over weight and that you don't bathe often enough. It might be that you just need to spend a few hours in the gym each day and jump in the shower when you get home. =P

Really though talk it out with her and as long as the two of you can be open with each other you should be able to work it out.

Some other things you could consider doing would be playing some sort of sex game that takes the need for either one of you to start things out of the equation. This way you wouldn't feel like you always have to start things and she wouldn't feel uncomfortable about being forced into starting.

My wife and I made a little dice game that we play almost every night. We have 11 sexual acts that gives a lot of pleasure to each of us. They are numbed 2-12 and we roll dice and let that decide what we will do that evening. We talked these out in a 6 hour car trip and I'm pretty sure we were working out details for a sold 3 hours. People are different. I've been marred for almost 8 years and I just learned today that my wife doesn't like sexual acts where one person gets all the play... Even if its her.

Our list is below but I strongly suggest that you and your wife create your own. Talking about everything to come up with this list left us both horny as hell and really excited about trying the new game.

2. Tease each other for 15min "No Orgasms"
3. Tease each other for 30min "No Orgasms"
4. Tease each other for 15min "She Orgasms"
5. Tease each other for 30min "She Orgasms"
6. I tease, dominate, and spank her while she worships my cock "I decide if she gets to orgasm"
7. I tease, dominate, and bind while she worships my cock "I decide if she gets to orgasm"
8. Tease each other then she sits on top of her vibrator while giving me head. "Race for the Orgasm, 2nd place doesn't cum"
9. Tease each other for 30min "Both Orgasm"
10. I tease, put her vibrator on, and leave. Checking back every 10-30min to let her edge me with her mouth. "Both Orgasm"
11. Ball Massage "She decides if I orgasm"
12. Tease each other "She brings me to the edge over and over until she orgasms."


Hope this gives you some ideas.