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FB: A tease by the pool (my first tease)
Posted: Mon Mar 28, 2011 8:36 pm
by switchhitter87
I just published my first tease. Its prett short but at least I gave it a try. What does everyone think of it?
Re: FB: A tease by the pool (my first tease)
Posted: Mon Mar 28, 2011 9:30 pm
by Quazwierdcev283
Switchhitter,
I know that some people value feedback on their teases and the first tease is especially crucial. I would agree that your first tease is rather short, but I thought it was well done. I thought the model was very attractive. If you wanted to flesh it out you might want to explain why she has decided to tease the viewer and/or what she hopes to gain from teasing the viewer.
Just my two bits,
Re: FB: A tease by the pool (my first tease)
Posted: Mon Mar 28, 2011 11:17 pm
by cockgod
Well done overall, but too short to enjoy.
Re: FB: A tease by the pool (my first tease)
Posted: Tue Mar 29, 2011 5:22 am
by billlr
I really like Bikini Riot. It's just a shame the tease was too short.
BTW, here is MY first tease:
http://www.milovana.com/webteases/showtease.php?id=4549
Let me know what you think of it.
Bill
Re: FB: A tease by the pool (my first tease)
Posted: Tue Mar 29, 2011 2:53 pm
by bookworm
switchhitter87 wrote:I just published my first tease. Its prett short but at least I gave it a try. What does everyone think of it?
I am afraid it did nothing for me. It was just a series of instructions. You need to develop some sort of fantasy/storyline.