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Haunted house
Posted: Tue Dec 10, 2019 12:47 am
by Longplay1
Hey, i just finished my new tease. I would love to know yours opinions about it. here is the link if you want to try it.
https://milovana.com/webteases/showtease.php?id=43030
Re: Haunted house
Posted: Tue Dec 10, 2019 6:54 am
by Roblsforbobls
Damn, that was super cool! Would have been a great Halloween themed tease if it was released in October. It kind of had the vibe of that old NES game "Uninvited." Was genuinely creeped out, nice work with this one!
I liked how you added a scene selection at the beginning - that made the different scenes more accessible. The story was great, and so was the image/audio selection. It always felt like I was at the same place, despite that the images were clearly from different sources sometimes. The audio was definitely effective at creating that tense/horror modd you were going for, on top of really making the scenes hot. There were a lot of images and audio files that you didn't need to include to tell the story, but you added them because they improved the experience - that is a testament to how hard you worked on this!
Some things that I think can be improved on: I found a bunch of spelling/grammatical errors here and there (nothing too bad, but noticeable nonetheless). When I got a bad ending, I thought the text you wrote was mysterious, but I would have liked a little more developed description of what happens to really make it chilling, because it has a lot of potential. I would have liked the opening scene to have skippable text - it seemed to overstay its welcome a bit just because I was waiting for each line to move on to the next line (the text in the rest of the tease was fine not being skippable though.)
Re: Haunted house
Posted: Tue Dec 10, 2019 1:42 pm
by Longplay1
Roblsforbobls wrote: Tue Dec 10, 2019 6:54 am
Damn, that was super cool! Would have been a great Halloween themed tease if it was released in October. It kind of had the vibe of that old NES game "Uninvited." Was genuinely creeped out, nice work with this one!
I liked how you added a scene selection at the beginning - that made the different scenes more accessible. The story was great, and so was the image/audio selection. It always felt like I was at the same place, despite that the images were clearly from different sources sometimes. The audio was definitely effective at creating that tense/horror modd you were going for, on top of really making the scenes hot. There were a lot of images and audio files that you didn't need to include to tell the story, but you added them because they improved the experience - that is a testament to how hard you worked on this!
Some things that I think can be improved on: I found a bunch of spelling/grammatical errors here and there (nothing too bad, but noticeable nonetheless). When I got a bad ending, I thought the text you wrote was mysterious, but I would have liked a little more developed description of what happens to really make it chilling, because it has a lot of potential. I would have liked the opening scene to have skippable text - it seemed to overstay its welcome a bit just because I was waiting for each line to move on to the next line (the text in the rest of the tease was fine not being skippable though.)
Thank you for your comment. You made some good points. Next time i will do even better :)
Re: Haunted house
Posted: Wed Dec 11, 2019 8:08 am
by Roblsforbobls
Longplay1 wrote: Tue Dec 10, 2019 1:42 pm
Thank you for your comment. You made some good points. Next time i will do even better :)
I'm looking forward to it :D
Re: Haunted house
Posted: Thu Dec 12, 2019 5:37 pm
by Adrast
I also liked it, I see no reason to repeat what has already been said. I did not notice grammatical errors, probably because English is not my first language. However, there is a moment that was created as it seemed to me wrong. I'm talking about the moment of loss. If you lose in some part of teas, it will just be a line - "you lost, goodbye." The mechanics of losing could also be made interesting and justified by the plot. For example, you can make this demoness or an evil ghost (who she is?) take the hero into the depths of her den. There she would have tortured the hero, bringing him to the edge over and over again and forcing him to cum. Maybe even a couple of times. Thus, she pumps out forces from the hero in order to get out of the house and fulfill her revenge throughout the world. Or something like that.
In any case, a wonderful job.
Re: Haunted house
Posted: Thu Dec 12, 2019 11:38 pm
by Qiubi
there's a bug choose that send you to the start of the tease.
it's when you find the 2 girls on red latex, when you click in (on the edge) button it send you to the start.
also we are supose to Cum when the girls tell you to Cum while you are on the edge???
Re: Haunted house
Posted: Fri Dec 13, 2019 8:03 am
by Longplay1
Qiubi wrote: Thu Dec 12, 2019 11:38 pm
there's a bug choose that send you to the start of the tease.
it's when you find the 2 girls on red latex, when you click in (on the edge) button it send you to the start.
also we are supose to Cum when the girls tell you to Cum while you are on the edge???
It is meant to tease you this way to cum but you are not allowed. I will look at the button problem. Thanks for info
Re: Haunted house
Posted: Fri Dec 13, 2019 8:11 am
by Longplay1
Longplay1 wrote: Fri Dec 13, 2019 8:03 am
Qiubi wrote: Thu Dec 12, 2019 11:38 pm
there's a bug choose that send you to the start of the tease.
it's when you find the 2 girls on red latex, when you click in (on the edge) button it send you to the start.
also we are supose to Cum when the girls tell you to Cum while you are on the edge???
It is meant to tease you this way to cum but you are not allowed. I will look at the button problem. Thanks for info
The (on the edge) button repaired