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[NEW] Making you my slave forever
Posted: Fri Nov 22, 2019 8:56 pm
by kane86
Hi all,
Published my first tease today after years visiting this website on a regular basis. It took me one afternoon to write and English is not my first language but I really hope you will like it.
If you have any feedback, let me know. If you'd like a sequel, let me know too and upvote!
Thanks.
Re: [NEW] Making you my slave forever
Posted: Fri Nov 22, 2019 9:31 pm
by blackteacoffee
I thought it was pretty good. I would love a sequel.
Re: [NEW] Making you my slave forever
Posted: Sat Nov 23, 2019 8:59 am
by Tury
Honestly, the writing was okay but in no way was it a tease. No stroking orders, no toy play, not even a suggestion to play along and pretend she's doing something to you. Not a bad idea, and a series would be cute but right now it's a 1st person story at best.
Re: [NEW] Making you my slave forever
Posted: Sat Nov 23, 2019 1:57 pm
by Quarz
I agree with Tury. The writing was good, but for a webtease there should be more interaction in my opinion.
I think the opportunity for a sequel is there. After all she announced more teasing in the coming days or maybe even after the 30 days.
Re: [NEW] Making you my slave forever
Posted: Sat Nov 23, 2019 9:11 pm
by kane86
I definitly get the point about the lack of interactivity. It was intentional to write it more as a first person story rather than a tease. I always loved Cactusman stories back in the days.
I still didn't find a good way to incorporate instructions in my story and still make it sound like it is part of the story.
Maybe next time!
Re: [NEW] Making you my slave forever
Posted: Sun Nov 24, 2019 8:34 am
by Ghingis
Re: [NEW] Making you my slave forever
Posted: Mon Nov 25, 2019 3:33 pm
by StokkEN
I really liked this! Nevermind the interactivity part! It's a super sexy story, reminds me a lot of "gia's game" one of my favourite teases ever. Would love to see more of your writing!!
Re: [NEW] Making you my slave forever
Posted: Mon Nov 25, 2019 9:54 pm
by kane86
StokkEN wrote: Mon Nov 25, 2019 3:33 pm
I really liked this! Nevermind the interactivity part! It's a super sexy story, reminds me a lot of "gia's game" one of my favourite teases ever. Would love to see more of your writing!!
I did'nt know about Gia's game. I'll check it out :)
Definitly planning on writting more on my side. I just need life to give me some time for doing it!
I have good ideas for at least 2 more parts and I think I will make it a 5-6 parts serie.
In episode 3 or 4 I will introduce another character - counting on the community to suggest the name of a model I could use. (There has to be enough material out there for me to find what I need).