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Happy Birthday Princess

Posted: Fri Jul 18, 2008 11:08 pm
by HogtiedCowboy
Please leave any and all feedback.

Thanks

Feedback: Happy Birthday Princess

Posted: Sat Jul 19, 2008 5:20 am
by all2true
May I also wish a Happy birthday as well.

Being from the midwest
I loved the cowboy theme
Great picks!

A bit short
but still a nice
quick birthday wish.

Re: Feedback: Happy Birthday Princess

Posted: Sat Jul 19, 2008 10:57 am
by Mz_Teneale
Hiya hogtied... I should of known you would write a cowboy webtease :smile:

I thought it was pretty good. It was short but i was there in the chat when you were handed this assignment, so i know the circumstances you were in.

I love kate, i think she is gorgeous (besides here weird foot). You could have gone into more detail text wise i think, im not a huge fan of "get to the edge now" phrases, especially in your tease, i think by memory you used it on the third page. Webteases should slowly build the reader up and up until he cant help but edge.

I especially liked the way the tease didnt end once the reader came. Im a big fan of that and my next tease may include a bit of that.

I gave it a 3 out of 5 ... Well done on such short notice! :-D

Re: Happy Birthday Princess

Posted: Sun Jul 20, 2008 5:56 am
by HogtiedCowboy
Thank you Mz_Teneale,

One for honoring me by even reading my tease, and two for leaving feedback for me to improve.

I will certainly take the criticisms into account on my next tease...maybe it will elicit a 4 from you?

Humbly,
HogtiedCowboy