Tips for managing relashionship as hypersexual

[Zarkhes]

Now, i know this forum is more towards submisive. But its the only place i know.

Story short, u am in love with my GF. 6 months, emotionaly its perfect. Sexualy its constant battle. I have decided that i will vent my urges in "safe spot". I just want to find someone to flirt with, maybe cybersex. No strings. Yes, i am scum and liar. But i will choose leser evil, if it helps...

Is anyone hyper too here? Is this good idea, or am i digging my hole even deeper? How did you solve this?

[thatsprettyhot]

Well, no judging here, everyone chooses their own path. However, from my own experience I feel that leaving lots of things unspoken is likely to ultimately lead to some kind of distance growing between a couple, so my sincere recommendation is to have a long thought about what kind of things about your own desires you would be able to talk about with your gf. For sure I think there may be things that are better kept to oneself, but to close the inevitable gap a little I think it might be best not to completely leave your companion clueless about your activity level and see what you come up with to do more together.

And practically, I think a great way to smoothly encourage something you think is helping and increases your quality time together, is to always give praise when something was nice or you enjoyed. Because I think everyone likes to know that they did well and are appreciated, and it's increasing the chances of that happening more often. Always do something nice to let them know they did well

[Zarkhes]

This is past communication. We talked about everything. We even planing sexuology session.
Point is, i want sex each day. I crave it, i need it. She is fine only once a week, top. 80% of sex we having is because i want, not because she wants. She is physicly and mentaly exhausted from sex. I just dont want to force her. But on the other hand masturbation is just not enough.

Talk wont fix anything, i need distraction so i dont dont destroy my relationship with my sex drive.

[manwithcape]

Talk honestly about your needs.
Ethical non-monogamy is possible.

If you try to satisfy your desires without her knowledge you will not save your relationship.
You will be discovered, probably quite soon and your relation will be ruined.

If you talk honestly about all options you can either find something that works or decide that it won't work and you can keep a great friend and start the search for a compatible partner a lot sooner.
Oh and you will not be ashamed of yourself. That's always a good thing right?

[Noah]

I am glad to hear you are seeking help from a professional. It sounds like it puts a lot of pressure on the relationship (for both parties). Especially if you are both happy about the relationship then I would strongly advice against the tendencies you feel. Instead of judging yourself for these tendencies it might be helpful to explore why it takes a rather destructive form.

A treatment (it does not matter if it is neurological or mental) would always focus on regaining control and managing your urges (by reducing excessive behaviors while maintaining a healthy sexual life).

Often when it is a mental problem it can take a form on the surface (hyperarousal) that overshadows a deeper inner problem (for an example: attachment). If that is the case then the latter has to be treated to gain the most steps!

I wish you both the best of luck!